As you're looking at the image, just think about all the Nyanko you're NOT seeing because they're piled under all the others...

Well, in my last entry I said I'd introduce my boys... first is Kurosakura, one of my long standing RPG characters. He was originally based on Sephiroth from Final Fantasy VII, but over the past several years became his own character:

And second is my vampire, Shido. He's visually based on Shido from Nightwalker. Personality-wise, he's a lot different. He's a very trad vamp.

I'm a bit embarassed to admit I have more than just these two. I've also got two girls, neither of whom is finished. And I'm expecting a fifth who is much smaller. Philip and I first saw this type of doll in Japan and we thought they looked very cool. But they're also really overwhelming and its hard to know where to start. It wasn't until a couple of years later that I got one. They are a lot of work. For the most part, they come completely blank. Its hard to describe the sheer range of stuff available for them. Wigs, eyes, clothes, shoes, accessories. There's even a ton of different artists who do the detail painting on the faces. Its also possible to modify the dolls themselves. Both of my boys are modified. Amongst other things, they had their original human ears sanded off and elf ones put on.

But so... yeah. Those are my two 60cm-tall boys. I'm actually getting a different body for Kurosakura. He's gonna be 64cm tall before too long.

I know I never write here anymore... I don't know why. Maybe its because for a while I was really angry and upset. When I wrote out that stuff here in order to vent, it caused more trouble than it was worth. Life hadn't been perfect. It still isn't, but I guess I'm not quite as angry now. But I am bored. And I feel trapped in some ways. Trapped by the house. Trapped by the area we're living in. Trapped by the fact I can't get a job without it causing a heck of a lot of extra stress. I also feel trapped by my own inability to do anything productive during the day.

I still don't draw anymore. I don't know if I miss it or not. I feel like I should miss it, like its some terrible crime that I'm not drawing. But in the end, it doesn't matter. I was never cut out to be an illustrator anyways. I'm more interested in photography now. My newest hobby provides a good subject and focus for it. And I'm enjoying it a lot, even if I am getting frustrated at my inability to expand my photographic horizons. I seem to take the same type of photo over and over. I know its this repetition that makes someone truly good at something, so I don't mind too much. But I see people taking the sort of photographs that I wish I could and it reminds me of how much I'm lacking.

I've tried to avoid talking about my new hobby here a lot because its really strange for me. It involves dolls. But not the girly type of dolls. These are Asian Ball-Jointed Dolls aka 'Super Dollfie's - Two foot tall resin dolls that are highly posable and customizable. And they're expensive. If you don't already know how expensive they are, you don't want to know how expensive they are. So don't ask. They're a really good creative outlet for me though because they're an exercise in character design in and of themselves. And I also use them as photographic subjects. I'm even going to learn how to use a sewing machine so I can design and make my own clothing for them. I've actually bought a sewing machine, but its been sitting completely untouched for a month or so because I really have absolutely no idea where to start. And its scary.

Once I find someone to show me how to use my machine and I get good at making doll's clothing, I can easily scale it up to make people-sized clothing. I've always been good at designing alternative clothing and maybe now I'll finally get the chance to do something with it.

Its late now, 2:00AM exactly as I'm finishing up writing this. So its time to go to bed. Maybe tomorrow I'll post a few pictures of my dolls.

With autumn here and Halloween just around the corner, I was kind of homesick for s'mores. There are two very large problems with this however... here in the UK, there is no Hersey's chocolate. And perhaps more importantly, there is no such thing as graham crackers. But a few weeks back Philip bought this type of cookie/biscuit thing called a 'digestive,' an utterly common and unassuming item usually dipped into tea. Granted, its been several years since I had a graham cracker, but these 'digestives' really reminded me of them. Or at the very least they reminded me of the memory of them.

So today I armed myself with a package of digestives, some 'Galaxy' brand chocolate (its the nicest cheap chocolate you can buy over here), and some marshmellows. One biscuit on the bottom, two sections of chocolate and two marshmellows went into the oven for five minutes. The top biscuit got put on after I took it all out of the oven and I now have a disgustingly sugary gooey melted mess oozing all across a plate. Its lovely.

They're not square though, they're round. English S'mores are round.

And you thought bonsai cats were just an internet legend...